


I've got a crush on you

by Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire



Series: Di’s Carry On Countdown 2020 [24]
Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Baz decides to rely on Vera’s knowledge of the modern world, Boom Box could be a mobile, Carry On Countdown (Simon Snow), Courting Ideas, Courting Rituals, Gift Fic, If there was a mobile to locate, M/M, Niall is a Good Friend, Oblivious Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Penelope Bunce & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Friendship, Penelope Bunce Knows, Penelope Bunce is a Good Friend, Penny and Baz are bros whether they realize it or not, Prompt Fic, SnowBaz, Song Lyrics, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Is Plotting, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch Loves Simon Snow, even if it's low key it's still there, of sorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:07:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27757399
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire/pseuds/Sharing_a_room_with_an_open_fire
Summary: [Mature] 18+ Simon and Baz. (Mature for language.)Set Watford 8th year.Music is romantic. However there are other options available when it comes to courting.Part 10 ofButter SeriesCOC 2020 Day 24, DEC 18: Song.Inappropriate humour.
Relationships: Dev & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Niall & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Penelope Bunce & Simon Snow, Penelope Bunce & Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Simon Snow, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch & Vera, Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch/Simon Snow
Series: Di’s Carry On Countdown 2020 [24]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2023208
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23
Collections: Carry On Countdown 2020





	I've got a crush on you

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BelaLugosi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BelaLugosi/gifts).



> Dear reader, I hope you will enjoy this silly ficlet. Part 10 of **[Butter](https://archiveofourown.org/series/2030383) Series**.💙  
>   
>  **Loveliest friend** , this is for you. 🥺🥺🥺 I hope you will like it. 💙💙💙
> 
> * * *
> 
> As always so many thanks and love to my amazing friends and betas Blue ([mybluebucketofsnow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mybluebucketofsnow/pseuds/mybluebucketofsnow)), [shushu_yaoi_lj (llamapyjamas)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shushu_yaoi_lj/pseuds/shushu_yaoi_lj) and [Theawkwardbibliophile](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theawkwardbibliophile/works).  
>   
> Thank you for all the help and support with this COC and everything I write and for being awesome friends. 💙
> 
> * * *

# BAZ

After a successful conversation with Niall the other day, I’ve decided that some quality flirting is in order if I want to win Simon’s heart.

My best friend has hinted that asking Snow out might be the right step forward in our relationship. 

“You have so much to offer, Baz,” Niall said to me yesterday.

I suppose he is right. 

And yet my superior intellect and exceptionally good looks notwithstanding I am not convinced I have what it takes to court Simon _properly_.

No doubt with additional help from Niall, I can find a way to win Snow’s heart. Two heads are better than one and all that.

As stated previously, my best friend is worldly and he is also exceedingly smart. Not as intelligent as me or Bunce, but most likely an honourable third place.

”Some people get inspiration from music,” he suggests as I catch him outside of Mummers House.

”Ah yes, what a brilliant idea, my lad,” I tell Niall because it really is.

Usually, I spend my time working on a Kishi Bashi song that my stepmother, Daphne, calls “needlessly morose.” 

However, I believe there is a need for a more joyful melody. 

Ella Fitzgerald has quite a few cheerful tunes. That surely will qualify as modern music. Vera — my nanny — listens to Ella all the time. 

And no, Vera doesn't know what Grindr is. But that might just be a one-off. Now that I think about it, Vera knows lots of things. I can always rely on her keeping me hip enough. 

“Are you coming up?” Niall asks.

“Oh no, there is something I need to do first,” I answer and wonder where Bunce might be right about now.

Library most definitely. I’d be there too, trying to best her if I wasn’t this preoccupied with my love life. (Or well my future love life.)

“I’ll see you later mate,” Niall calls after me. I’ve accidentally forgotten he’s there. (I am on a mission.)

“Yes, see you later, Niall.”

I have a brilliant plan. There was this movie I watched with Vera as a child about a boy standing with a juice box and playing a song for his crush. It’s a foolproof plan and has a _modern_ clang to it.

The perfect song would be Ella’s ‘I’ve Got A Crush On You’.

Not only does it tell our love story accurately but it’s catchy as well. Surely there is no of a more fitting romantic song about us in the world. 

“Bunce,” I call after her as soon as I spot her in the library with the mountain of books on the table. (I’ve read them all I notice with satisfaction and smirk internally.)

“Baz,” she doesn’t sound too happy to see me. “Simon isn’t here. But you might want to talk to him and put me out of my misery.”

I have no idea what she’s on about.

“I’m not here for Snow,” I sneer because some habits never die. “Can I borrow your contraband mobile?”

Sitting down next to her, I speak softly so no one would hear. Although I am fairly sure it is common knowledge around here. I had one myself before Dev accidentally dropped it down the moat.

I am not going to pick it up from there with all the merwolves. Besides I am fairly certain they ate it already.

“I’d love to, but Gareth has borrowed it and I am not sure I want it back,” she grimaces. “I have it on good authority he’s been filming himself in order to improve his spell casting skills.”

“With his pelvis?” I ask sympathetically and almost put my hand on her shoulder to soothe her traumatised mind, but not quite. (Don’t want people to think I’m kind. I am taking that secret to the grave.)

“Yes, possibly wearing nothing but his belt and the belt buckle,” Bunce exhales, shuddering and shakes her head. “I can never unsee that.”

“My condolences to your phone, Bunce,” I say and do place my hand on her shoulder for exactly three seconds, (despite my better judgment.)

She nods gratefully at me, without making a big deal out of my display of emotions. _Good woman._

“I told Mum I lost my phone so she’ll get me a new one,” she finally speaks.

“A wise choice.”

“Why did you need it anyway?” she finally asks. “I thought you had your own?”

I shake my head. “Dev dropped it into the moat while taking pictures with merwolves for his Instagram.”

Bunce chuckles and rolls her eyes. 

“Oh. Can’t you make a call from Miss Possibelf’s office then?” she suggests.

“Well, it’s not a call I am looking for,” I admit and raise my chin high. “I am going for a grand gesture.”

She locks eyes with me and sighs almost exasperated for whatever reason.

“Give Simon something he loves, or _anything_ really,” she then says, leaving me utterly surprised.

I always knew Bunce was smart. But I didn’t know how far her intellect stretches. 

“Well, I might have an idea or two,” I say without shoving any shock on my face. “I’ll see you later, Bunce.”

“Good luck, Basil,” she says and then adds after a moment, “Don’t overthink it.”

“Why would I?” I sneer and wave at her with a small smile. (Crowley, I am losing my touch.)

I am going to make bacon butties for Simon with extra butter. (I have a key to the kitchens.) 

And then I bring him that and a freshly boiled cup of tea with butter instead of milk. I want to give Simon what he loves the most in this world. 

What can I say? I am brilliant and I know it.

  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. 💙


End file.
